Happy Sunday ya’ll!
Today’s post is something that I am currently going through. It’s a process I find myself using as I get older. What is this process? Well, it’s asking myself tough questions. Questions about what I want and where I would like to go. Recent opportunities have come up and I needed some time to think about. Like really think about. Why? Because I know these opportunities will take time and energy out of me. As an introvert, I spend my time wisely. I want to make sure I get some solid experience in what I'm getting into. I also want to make sure it tunes into my frequency if we're talking in the Law of Attraction terms. Furthermore I have remind myself why I am doing what I’m doing. There’s nothing worse than waking up and wondering what you’re doing.
With this being said, here is process that use to work through the tough questions and how to sort through it all. This is also the process I used when deciding that I wanted to become a theatre major. [Yes, eighteen year old Geneva did things that most young people wouldn’t dare to do.]
List What It Is You Want
You need to know what you want in order to manifest the life you want to have. I can’t tell you how many people I’ve met who wish or want something and never do anything about it. Thus it’s important to list the kinds of jobs you would like to have. For me, I’d like to live as a nomad. When I finish college, I am traveling the world, blogging, theatre making, and dancing. This means my frequency is high on gaining experience as a performer and connections with other theatre makers. I am also writing this blog to discuss topics I am passionate about and help the world. I am also learning how I work as a collaborator, especially with friends.
Remember that you might not know what you want at first. That’s okay. Instead, try something you’re interested in. That way you’ll know if there’s more options for you in the field you want to get into.
Put That Frequency On Blast
Yes, you heard me right. Turn that frequency up like there’s a party going on. [And yes I fully aware that sentence sounds like I was some crazy MC at terrible college party.] You might look a little loony but remember that this is your manifestations you want to come true. No one else’s. Sending high vibrations to the things you want in your life is critical to receiving.
Tell yourself that you love [the manifestation] and say everything as if it’s in the present. From real life experience, I can tell you that this is true. It is the reason for everything in my life.
Doing this will help you stay in a positive mindset about what it is you want. Furthermore, it will allow you to make the first actions in your journey whether that is doing a marathon or starting your own business.
Formulate The Important Questions
Once you’ve found opportunities, it’s time to weed out the ones that are right for you. Use your intuition to navigate through the options that will lead you towards your desired goal. This is also the phase questions begin to formulate.
I tend to find that most opportunities are great to me. This is most definitely true since I’ve only been doing theatre for about five and half years. Therefore I have come up with some questions to navigate me and my intuition along.
The main ones I tend to ask myself are these:
Pros and Cons List
After asking myself these questions, I make a pros and cons list. Yes I do the activities that a five year old would do. Basically. I list out all the positive and negative aspects of taking this opportunity including how my weekly schedule will be and if my body can handle it. It’s important to know how you want your time to be spent.
As a theatre maker, I know the value of time like the back of my hand. Therefore I do not waste time. It's important to remember not to keep yourself too busy. We do need breaks every once and awhile. Also there’s only so much work that a brain can handle so don’t spread yourself too thin.
Decide What Options You Want and Run with It
Make sure the option you want aligns with your intuition and manifestation. If it’s not a part of the manifestation, then it’s not necessary. Furthermore, don’t wait for someone to hand it to you. Eventually the activities and habits you do become a part of you and your life. In other words don’t waste your time.
I hope ya’ll liked this post. Keep in mind that there are no right questions, especially what it comes to deciding what you want. It’s more in tuning in with your intuition and putting that frequency on blast. Remember that this is your life so live it.
Namaste and have a great night or day wherever you are.
Happy Sunday ya’ll!
Today’s post is a continuation on the topic of minimalism. I'd like to share with you the process I use when getting rid of stuff. Also known as De-cluttering 101. This is especially useful if you are going minimalist or feel the items piling up in your life. I still use this process as a way to keep my goals and minimalist journey on track. Keep in mind that this is a process that I use. Therefore, it may not work for everyone but this seems to be the main process for most people.
So without further ado here's my little process:
1. Set Life Priorities
The only way to get rid of things is to figure out what you want. It is a great starting point for anything really. I’ve been doing this for the past two years and it’s kept my life on track. In my minimalist journey, this was pretty simple. I knew that I wanted to do professional theatre (mostly avant garde and physical theatre), dance, travel, and have a blog on veganism, minimalism, and spirituality (hence this blog). Therefore a majority of the items I would need would be technology and information based. I also knew that my mountain bike, dance shoes, and I would be together forever. I’m serious. I don’t think there’s anything that can separate us. There is also that part about owning a few plays and learning dance routines here and there but you get the point.
2. Begin Sorting Out Stuff
This is the hard part. It is for most people. It means getting honest and real about the wants. It means putting wants into actions. For me it was proof that this minimalist life wasn’t all in my head. That I wasn’t some crazy eighteen year old trying to let go of old baggage.
When doing this step, I suggest sorting out the easy items first like clothes. Or kids toys. Or anything that doesn't match what your values and goals are. This step varies for everyone so take your time. Furthermore, it’s not so hard on your brain and you can work through some of the mental blocks that might be deterring you from getting rid of the larger and more attached items. I also suggest reminding yourself this: “it’s okay. Everything is okay.” There is a reason for things that come and go through your life.
3. Pack It
Yup ya’ll read that right. Pack it out of sight. Set a deadline. If you need one of the items before the deadline, then you still need it. If not, then it’s time to let go. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve done this and it’s always told me the truth.
4. Donate/Sell the Items
This is the most rewarding part. When I gave away or sold my unwanted items, I found a sense of peace knowing it was going to be used by someone else. Even more than that, I found myself letting go. Like actually feeling and experiencing what it was like to let go. That sounds dumb, but it’s true. I was so stuck in a low mindset that I forgot what it was like to be a giving person. To do selfless acts for both ends sakes.
Like I said before, there are many ways to getting rid of old junk especially when going minimalist. Therefore this isn’t the end all, be all of de-cluttering 101. I hope ya’ll have a great day/night! Stay awesome and love yourselves.
Happy Sunday ya'll!
As promised today's post is light hearted and informational. Today I am discussing something is that very important to me: minimalism. Now a lot of people ask me what minimalism is. Hence I am writing this post. The main focus of this post is to inform you on minimalism as well as give a crash course on how to go minimalist.
Without getting too technical, minimalism is when a person owns nothing but the objects they use. Keep in mind a lot of minimalists are digital nomads. That is their work is online which allows them to move from place to place. This means a person could live in Europe for three months then come over to the United States for a bit without hassle. For example a person might own four outfits, seven pairs of underwear, a computer, and a bike that they travel on. Another person might only have a blank apartment with not that many decorations, a mattress with sheets and a blanket, and a kitchen that has multi-faceted utilities. This may explain why artists and musicians don't own many physical items, even when they become successful.
Nevertheless, this lifestyle looks different on many people. For me I only own four boxes of stuff. At least for my dorm. These boxes contain the things I need for the school year: dance clothes (which is mostly work out clothes), my rice cooker, blender, bathroom stuff, my camera, yoga mat, roller, and three reusable grocery bags. There are probably a few things I'm missing but that's it. I'm not kidding. Yes I do have some posters and miscellaneous objects but those are things I enjoy having. They are handheld and no bigger than the size of my face which means I can get rid of them at any time. Nevertheless, Move-in and move-out time are pretty easy for me.
Now getting to this point isn't easy for some people. Some people go minimalist because they want to be environmentally conscious, they have a hoarding problem, or feel they need to cleanse their life. For me, it was a little bit of everything. I found that I was holding onto my dysfunctional past like a crutch. I needed to de-clutter and start over. I also had, and still have, aspirations to travel after college so I didn't want that much stuff.
Little did I know how deep getting rid of my stuff would take me. I had to see how insane I was during my eating disorder. And, it wasn't pretty. It was jarring to see. It made me realize how powerful the sub-conscious is. How we can keep unwanted thoughts without realizing it. My parents were questioning me about my decision to do this. They thought I was going through a depression. In all honesty I was letting go and growing up. I was finding that the past wasn't serving me any longer and I needed to move on. Otherwise I would have been a complete mess.
Some of the main minimalist building blocks is in regards to this question: what are your aspirations/goals? If you're aspiration is to live from place to place, then you won't need that much stuff. But if you want to live in one place, then ask this question (which sort of ties into the first question): where do my morals and values lie? This will help with figuring out what things to let go of.
The main question I asked myself was this: are going to use this for the future? If it was a no, then I got rid of it without mercy. For clothes it was, and still is, this: if I haven't worn it in a year, then it's time to let go of it.
One podcast that really helps me is called The Minimalists where Joshua Fields Millburn and Ryan Nicodemus discuss the ups and downs of being minimalist. This podcast has helped me so much and I hope it does for you too.
As you can tell, this process is about letting go and focusing your aspirations. It's not easy but I can tell you it's worth it.
I hope ya'll enjoyed this post. Namaste.
Honestly, I’m scared to write this post. I am not sure if I’m going to post this. It gnaws at the core of my being to write about this. Why? Because I’m talking about a detox that I did. One that I knew would be difficult and scary. Yet it was something I needed. Something that my gut was telling me to do.
When I started this journey, I didn’t realize how deep it would go. I didn’t think that my childhood wounds would appear like sore thumbs. All the times I had blamed others for my problems. All the times I was teased in school for being an overweight kid and feeling dumb. Ultimately I realized that my judgments come from a deeply rooted insecurity that runs in all of us: feeling like we’re not enough.
From a young age I had an issue of always comparing myself to others. My classmates, family members, and people on T.V.. Pretty much everybody. People who I saw, "had it all." And it made me feel less than. Flash forward to middle school and I still carried that desire to be enough. That meant looking and acting like them. Yeah...I was a little nuts.
Then high school came and I lost over thirty pounds. I could fit into the clothes I didn’t think I’d ever fit into. People noticed but I didn’t tell people how I lost the weight. I didn’t want people to know the truth to my reality. It got to a point where I did have an eating disorder (ED). I don’t remember half of what I said or did because of how little I was eating. Then veganism came to the rescue. It literally saved my life. I don’t think I’d be here if it wasn’t for that discovery.
Now I’m in college and found myself having hard judgments towards others. When I say judgments, I’ll talking about the minor and the major ones. I didn’t know why this was happening. I had been ED free since 2014 and was continuing to judge those around me for specific lifestyle choices. Hence the Judgement Detox came to me.
This book came to me on accident. Well it was sort of an accident. It was recommended to me on Audible after I had finished Bernstein’s previous book The Universe Has Your Back. I thought to myself, “Let’s do this.” I was desperate and wanted live with myself at the end of the day. I couldn’t stand to think of judgments that were weighing down my self-esteem. I didn’t feel as great as I usually do. I was having a hard time sleeping and being a functioning human being. I needed to take action.
It’s been a month since I took on this challenge and I've grown as a person. For everyone this experience has been different but here are some lessons I've learned:
1. It’s Okay To Feel The Way You Feel
I used to hide my emotions because I wanted to “look strong.” I remember keeping myself from crying because I thought that was weak. But the reality is that emotions are powerful and looking like a mute is never a good thing. When I first felt these emotions I didn’t know what they were. It had been so long that I had forgotten they’d bothered me.
2. We All Have Trauma
I didn’t think I had trauma before doing this. I’m serious. I thought that my ED phase was done and that was it. But no. The universe needed to remind me that self-improvement is an ongoing process. That our words and actions have a deep and profound impact on people.
3. Being Judgement Free A Commitment
This was a hard pill to swallow. I knew going into this that I wouldn’t be the same person as before. I knew that I would learn tools and methods to help me combat dealing with judgement in the long term.
4. Some Judgments Take Longer To Work Through
In fact, I’m still working through some right now. And honestly finding the reason for some judgments takes time and energy. I just take it one day at a time.
The moral of this story is this: people need to constantly work on their inner selves. It’s hard as hell but it’s worth it. The important part is that we work through it. Don’t get me wrong, I slip up sometimes. In fact, I may or may not slip up weekly. But I forgive myself and move on. I let go of what I can’t control and listen to my inner guide.
This was hard to write. Not only because it happened recently but being vulnerable is hard. Sharing personal stories and struggles have always been tough for me. But it was worth it.
I promise that next week's post will be more light hearted and informational. Thank you for reading about my experience with this. I hope ya'll have a great day/night wherever you are. Namaste.
Happy Sunday ya’ll! Looks like I’m finally getting into this whole lifestyle blog. This is something I’ve wanted to do for a while so it feels nice to give people advice and share my life with you guys.
Anyways, today’s post is on the topic of mindfulness. More specifically mindfulness practices for stress. This is something my past self would have loved to have. Like I’m not even kidding you, she would have been eternally grateful for it. I am someone who had to learn the hard way in dealing with stress. I went to a cut-throat high school, so academics were intense. And it made me an intense person. I thought that a social life and my other aspirations were not possible. Seriously I remember being in middle school and thinking to myself, “WTF is a social life?” I literally cut people off and spent all my time in school. It was sad.
Overtime I developed a list of daily practices that continue to do me service. Some of these tend to be more often than others but it depends on the situation. I didn't include meditation because that's an automatic piece of advice I give to everyone and I wanted to find other ways as well. That's not to say meditation isn't useful. If anything it adds to any of these practices. So without further ado here you go.
I can’t tell you how much this simple technique has helped me in life. As a creative, you’re taught the power of breathing. It keeps your nerves down and you find your inner power. I’ve had many situations where I’ve used this because I can build a lot of anxiety around performances and school. I am reminded that everything’s okay. That it’s all in my head.
2. Positive Affirmations
This might sound cheesy and totally weird but it’s helpful. For those who don’t know what a positive affirmation is it’s a series of statements to affirm your beliefs. Hence affirmations. For example, if I want to decrease my self-doubt and fear about a particular goal I would say or think to myself “I deserve happiness and peace in my life.” It helps the brain from thinking too much and focus on taking action. We live in a world where people believe that the impossible is not possible. The truth is that one creates their reality. Their perception of the world is their perspective.
Now when I say exercise, I don’t mean killing yourself with cardio. I mean doing some type of movement that you enjoy. For example, I love to run, dance, lift weights and do yoga. It stimulates my brain and allows me to enjoy the present moment. Our culture makes us think that we must work out seven days a week and kill ourselves doing insane workouts. When really it’s about eating plant based and allowing positivity into your life. Otherwise all those workouts will go to waste.
It also helps me develop project ideas. As I run, I see images run through my head of possible theater productions or combinations I could do. I might sound insane for writing this part but it's true.
4. Recognize You’re Doing Your Best
This is a realization I came to a few weeks ago. I can get really into a project that I forget I have a life and friends. I want everything to go well and throw everything I have into it. In other words, I become a perfectionist. This definitely happens with my workout and school routines. I want things to go a certain way. Otherwise I feel like I’m slipping on thin ice.
Hence know that you are doing the best you can that day. You don’t have to be an overachiever. Just do the thing you set out to do with intention.
5. Getting Enough Sleep
I know what ya’ll are thinking: “Geneva…what are you asking of me?” Well I’m telling you because it helps. Also it’s important. The way to minimize stress is to manage your time well.
The best way I do this is to nap if I don’t get enough sleep the night before. I also make sure to set up my day so that I am not staying up doing work late at night. This is something I’ve started to do as I was desperate to decrease school and family stresses. For me, that means not using technology, saying positive affirmations [yes the affirmation thing came back again], and putting my faith in the universe’s hands.
6. Let Go
This is something I’ve alluded to before but it’s important. This means letting go of things that aren’t in your control. That not everything has to be perfect. This year I realized that I needed to let go of past resentments. It was building my current stresses and not making me feel like a great person. Don’t get me wrong it was, and still can be, painful. But as people we want to feel free not stuck in a mindset that isn’t serving us.
I’ve been working on this for a few weeks now and it’s been doing me wonders. I’ll make sure to write a post on this later.
With all these being said, know that there will be times you’ll slip up. The point is that you get back and up and start again. That failure’s a learning curve. I hope ya’ll have a wonderful night/day wherever you are. Namaste.
Happy Sunday ya’ll!
Today I might embarrass my future self with this blog post. In fact my future self might cringe and want to take a getaway trip to Thailand. Then again that sounds like a great idea now. Nevertheless I am still posting this. Today I’d like to share the mistakes I’ve made on my meditation practice. Keep in mind these are things that not everyone does. Just yours truly. Therefore don’t compare other people’s journeys to others.
So without further ado here you go:
This is my number one piece of advice for anything. Man have I struggled with this especially at the beginning. My mind could not understand that meditation happens before anything else in the day. Also that I had to make time for it. I wasn’t suddenly going to feel better because I wished for it to happen. That it meant taking away thoughts and beliefs that were hurting my spiritual growth.
Honestly though, I think a lot of this had to do with the fact that I let uncertainty take over. I didn't know how to break the cycle. I was mindlessly worrying all the time. I was trying to control every aspect of my life that it became unbearable.
Once I made this a daily practice, it became easier. I could think clearer and life was better.
2. Putting In The Work
In other words, I didn’t want to deal with my problems. I didn’t want to admit to myself that I had fallen off track. That I was becoming a hot mess and only cared about school. I feared that I wouldn’t make it in my spirituality practice because I had failed at so many other things. More than that I feared change. I didn’t want to find new rhythms and tempos because it was “too hard.”
3. Thinking Too Much
I’ve sort of touched on this before but I used to think. A lot. About fears and ridiculous situations that would never happen. I didn’t let my faith and love in the universe take over. I needed to remind myself that everything’s okay. That I’m right where I needed to be.
Now I just let my mindless thoughts pass. I tell myself that it's brain working, not my heart. That my brain helps me survive but my heart allows me to feel.
There you go. I’m sure there are many more to keep track of but these are the main ones. My point in telling you this is that sometimes this path bumpy. In fact it’s perfectly imperfect. You might not have the same positive practice as the day before or feel like nothing’s happening. It’s that we learn and let go. Don't hold onto the past because it won't bring anything but regret.
With all this being said (and possibly embarrassing my future self), I hope ya’ll have a great day. Namaste.
Happy Sunday ya'll.
Today's post will be about my spiritual journey. This is something I've kept to myself for the past four and half years. I'm not sure why I have but I have a feeling that now is the time to share the full story. Plus this is a blog about spirituality right?
My spiritual journey started in 2014. I just went vegan and was beginning to discover alternatives to curing my disordered eating and anxiety. It was also my senior of high school and I felt a sudden pressure to get accepted into all the best schools. It was ridiculous. I remember telling myself I had to apply to five or six schools. Why? I'm not sure. Nevertheless, I stumbled upon meditation as I discovered vegan YouTubers.
Now let me tell you, my first meditation wasn't the greatest. It took time to find the process that worked for me. I followed the myth that meditation is about "blocking your thoughts" when it's really about letting thoughts pass and building gratitude. I realized I was doing this wrong when I got the Head Space app. It was quite awkward when I discovered that.
So every morning I would get up and meditate for fifteen minutes. I would feel my heart rate slow down and realize that everything is okay. There's nothing wrong in this moment. Eventually my life started to come back together. Well, spiritually at least. I still had some mental blocks to work through.
Now flash forward to 2015. I had just gotten into college and was feeling nervous about the whole situation. I didn't know if college was right for me. Plus it was the first time I'd be away from my family and actually be taking care of myself. This was the time I fell out of my meditation practice. I didn't do my homework when it came to the facts of meditation if that makes sense. That is, I didn't lay my belief system for meditating like I did with veganism.
This hiatus lasted for about a year and half. Yes, people you heard me right. I didn't manifest anything for a year and half. Don't get me wrong I still did things but I wasn't taking control of my life the way I should have.
It wasn't until the beginning of 2017 did I feel a need to start my practice again. Social media was getting to me and I was waking up feeling groggy. I wanted to stop feeling like this and clear my mind of negative energy. Furthermore my personal life was falling apart. Or at least that's how it felt. A few people in my life passed away and I needed to build healthy habits in grieving. I had to remind myself that my mission as a human was still valuable. That I could spread the vegan message, become a traveler of sorts, and still be a theatre person.
Now this was not easy because I didn't want to deal with my emotions. I felt my anxiety coming back. Hard. I didn't want to face my reality because I was used living in my own world. Also I was so used to blocking my feelings that I had to have a tough conversation with me, myself, and I. I told myself that my sanity was worth fighting for and that the universe had my back. That my hiatus didn't matter. It was more about the present moment than anything else. This idea stuck with me and that summer I began to read various self-help books on relationships and, well, being present (as if I hadn't said that word enough). I also began taking ballet classes which gave me time to think. Think about what I wanted and who I wanted to be.
My meditation practice grew immensely during this time. I made it (and still make it a priority) to sit and manifest what I want for the day. Some days it feels it's not working but I know that it is. I remind myself that the universe has a plan for me and I must have trust in that plan. Moreover these books taught me lessons on life that I believe our society needs.
Today, I continue refer to these resources in times of need. I find other meditations for my stress, judgement, grieving, and many others. The judgement meditations are new so I am definitely going to do a blog post related to that in the coming month. I also do META and Transcendental meditation. Now I am still newbie and will continue to be because I'm discovering new things about myself everyday. My gratitude for the world and people around me is so great that it's difficult to get me in a bad mood. Seriously.
Like I said before I felt a need to share it with ya'll. I feel like spiritual people are seen as perfect beings when in reality we have our flaws. Including me, a person who went on an unintentional hiatus and identity crisis. Yet it turned out to be one of the best things to ever happen to me.
I hope ya'll enjoyed this story and have a great day/night wherever you are. Or to make things shorter namaste.
"Mindfulness is the invisible string that connects us"
Happy Sunday everyone! Today's topic is something I do everyday. In fact, it's a daily practice for me. It's something I chose to do when I went vegan over three years ago. At first I didn't know what it was called until I started doing yoga and meditation. What is this thing? Well it's called mindfulness.
But the mindfulness didn't start to take full effect until my freshman year of college. After my first semester, I sort of relapsed into my eating disordered behaviors. I could feel myself slipping and needed to learn what being present was all about. Plus I wanted to build muscle and rebuild my self-esteem. Then I started following a YouTuber by the name of High Carb Hannah. Her weight loss story inspired me to cure my disordered habits and the relationship I had with myself. Hence this is when the self-love journey really started for me.
Now I don't want ya'll to get the idea that this is some voo-doo concept. It's very practical actually. The idea is that this moment is great. Nothing will be as good as this moment. It's beautiful and amazing. Even if the situation has negative circumstances, there are still positive aspects to it. For instance, you learn more about yourself and what you need to change as a human being. As a theatre person I know exactly what this is like. I've had experiences where I know what to work on better in collaboration and the creative process.
An interest in listening to your gut (aka intuition) came up as well. I had the realization that the person who knows what's up is me. In other words, the gut is woke. I believe that listening to your gut is the universe's way of talking to you. It feels strange at first but eventually it becomes a guiding light.
So here are some ways to help make this a priority in your life because you're important:
1. Take Time For Yourself
As an introvert this is important. In order to know what you really want, you need to be alone and let your intuition talk. Sounds weird but it works. For me it was sitting and watching countless theatre performances in high school and being like, "I need to do this." Even when I went vegan it was sitting and watching countless documentaries and vegan YouTubers.
2. Remind Yourself That Everything's Okay
Not matter how bad the situation is, you must know that this will pass. As someone who came from a destructive past, I know this works. Even when I was having some negative thoughts I had to remind myself that everything will be okay.
3. Enjoy Silence
In other words find stillness. Even if it's a millisecond. In meditation this is something that's discussed frequently. I often find myself letting go of mindless worrying and situations that I can't control.
Now I'm not saying we need to attend a monastery to become a monk or nun. No, my point in writing this is to say that mindfulness isn't a fad. It's a way of life. I can't tell you how many people I've seen take this as a "test trial" and fail because they were only thinking about the end product. They aren't taking in the process that eventually becomes your lifestyle. My mindfulness has led to meet and curate long lasting friendships. It's also helped the negative thinking habits I get into. It's a way to understand yourself and the world around you. Furthermore, mindfulness is the invisible string that connects us.
Don't get me wrong, it takes a while to get the hang of it. I'm not kidding. It wasn't until last summer to understand this concept. I realized that I had present problems that I didn't want to deal with when it came to my mindfulness. I didn't want to accept my reality and actually work towards my goals.
With that being said, I hope this helps you guys understand this concept. I hope you have a great day or night wherever you are.
Hi guys! Today’s post is about one thing: self-talk. The way we talk about ourselves and how we need to view ourselves. This is something I recently discovered and want to share my knowledge on this subject. As someone who came from past self-destructive behaviors, negative self-talk is something that came up quite often. In fact, all the time.
It was a negative voice that haunted my dreams and crept into my real-life. It got to a point where I couldn’t walk outside my room without hearing it. So this is a few pieces of advice to quite the negative voices and focus on the positive aspects of life. Otherwise, we really wouldn’t really be living now would we?
1. Build Constructive Behaviors
This is imperative. I mean why else would this be number one? The reason people feel “stuck” is because they think they have to completely erase their past. The truth is they don’t. They have to start anew with constructive habits. Even when I relapsed I built behaviors that would benefit me. To my own surprise I found, painting as a constructive behavior. It helped me drown out the negativity and focus on letting out my emotions. Now I was no Picasso but it did let me feel free and not so in my head. Another constructive behavior I found was owning a gratitude journal. After my morning meditation, I write down all the things I’m grateful for and why I’m grateful for them. This practice reaffirms my beliefs and why I am doing what I’m doing.
2. Try New Things
For some reason this is what I pride myself on. It’s kind of ridiculous. I’ve never been someone do stick to or do just one thing. When I was younger I constantly switched sports just as much as I changed outfits. Then when I got to college I started to learn more about dance. I had been an art form I’d admired but felt I wasn’t good enough for. That is until things between my roommate and I got awkward. Hence, I spent time teaching myself hip-hop and eventually got into Modern and ballet. And now I’m getting the hang of it. This year I decided that I was going to hike more often. Honestly I don't know how I'm going to do this but we shall see what happens.
3. Avoid Self-Judgement
This one’s easier said than done. Trust me, I know. Whenever I see someone do this it tears me apart. I literally want to slam affirmations on self-love in their face. It’s worse when I see someone make self-deprecating jokes. Now the process that I’ve been doing is pretty simple: let go. Don’t hold on to the story you’ve been telling yourself. Because let’s be honest: It’s not true. The truth is you are the hero to your story, not the victim.
So instead of criticizing yourself just see that you are a human being. Someone who has emotions. Accept that some days will be better than others. The truth is you are amazing and deserve everything in life. Don’t ever discredit yourself for your own accomplishments.
4. Build Gratitude and Self-Love
Gratitude is my secret weapon out of every negative situation. Even in jealousy and sadness I’ve found a sense of solace and peace when I think of what I have now. I don’t find myself wishing to be someone else. Hence a cultivation of self-love occurs. And that, my friends, is beautiful.
5. Get Toxic People Out
Yes that’s right people. It’s time to weed out the ones who are using you. Now I’ve never dealt with this personally but I will say this: the real ones are the ones who love you for you. Not for what you have.
6. Change the Wording
Now I know what ya’ll are thinking: what do you mean by “change the wording?” Let me explain. Say you have a chore to do. Instead of saying “I have to do the dishes,” say “I get to do the dishes.” In terms of future goals, think “I am doing this,” not “I am going to.” Otherwise you will never get it done. This has gotten me out of the negative self-talk cycle many times. It brings you into the present moment and directly into gratitude. Without sounding preachy, this brings you back into cultivating self-love appreciation for what you have.
I hope this helps you break this cycle. But if anything remember that you are deserving of love and inner peace. I hope ya'll have a great day!
Hello everyone! Today's post is something I've been wanting to discuss for a while now. It's something that is close to my heart. Today I am giving you my self-help book recommendations. Keep in mind that I didn't just randomly pick these books. I read, listened, and experienced them first hand. These are words I continue to carry with me. But before I give you these recommendations, I want to give you a little context into what led me to these books.
This past summer I had something I didn't think would ever happen to me: an identity crisis. Every time I woke up, I didn't know who I was anymore. It scared me to know what the future held and how I was going to handle it. I was crossing the bridge from teenager to young adult. A prospect I wasn't too keen on happening. I would stay up at night trying to figure out what was going to happen after college. It was crazy. I was turning into a control freak on how I wanted my life to be. Basic questions surfaced like How are you going to make money? Where are you living after college? Are you doing a summer internship? This constant wondering led me to the brink of insanity.
I literally didn't know how to answer these questions and thought to myself: "I need to do something about this." I couldn't spend my life waiting for something to happen. And here I came to learning about the Law of Attraction and living in the present.
So without further ado, here are my book recommendations.
1. The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom by Don Miguel Ruiz
This book discusses pillars to living a peaceful and loving life. This book is literally the reason I am not so harsh on others anymore. I've learned to diminish the amount of judgement I have towards others. [Yes, it is difficult but it can be done.] I realized the importance of treating human beings and animals with respect. This book was a game changer in terms of personal relationships. I didn't realize how damaging I was being towards others with my actions. I realized that we are all at different stages in our lives. Therefore we must respect each other.
I love the simplicity and clarity the author gives to each pillar. That it's about not being hard on ourselves but instead focusing on the things that truly matter: love and respect.
2. The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle
This books discusses being present. This is something pop culture and society in general ignores. We promote hacks, tips, and tricks but not lifestyle changes. It goes into various tactics and ways into living your fullest life. I believe many people spend their days mindless worrying. Don't get me wrong, I've caught myself doing this as well. It's ridiculous. I've had days where I worry way too much about an issue in my personal life or college work that I need to get done.
That is when I remind myself that right now is okay. There's nothing wrong in this moment, so why are we worrying so much. This book proved to me that there is power in the present because nothing will be as good as this moment. Even as I am writing this I think to myself "nothing will be as good as this moment." Why? Because we don't know what's going to happen.
3. The Power by Rhonda Byrne
This one is sort of a hippie one but it's one that resonates with me deeply. As someone who spend years with limiting beliefs, this was the book that began a major transformation within myself. Rhonda Byrne's talks about something I've been interested for a while: the law of attraction. For those whom haven't heard of the law of attraction here's the main premise: if you ask and put in the work towards something, you will get it. This means visualizing and taking actions towards your goals.
The biggest take away I got from this book was to write your goals down as if it were in the present. I did just as the book instructed and I began to see opportunities for myself. I wrote out my creative and personal dreams. And I didn't just write personal goals. No, I wrote out everything in painstaking detail.
It changed the way I said things. For example, instead of saying "if" it's "when"; "No" is "not yet."These word changes allowed me to view my life through a different lens. I realize that there's more possibility than failure. And those failures prepare us for something great.
I still say these goals out loud to myself and visualize them everyday. The biggest mistake I notice with people who read this book is that they get tunnel vision. That is they get so focused on their goals that they forget about their current life or that visualization becomes a bottomless dream. Therefore my advice to you when reading this book is to check with yourself in a non-judgmental way. That is, don't sit and tell yourself how poorly your performed but ask yourself: Is this where I want to be?
4. You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay
This book is one that helped me in a major way. It talks about how to overcome our past mistakes and own ourselves now. I found the author's story inspiring. She goes into her troubled upbringing and how to overcame her struggles. She discusses how she became a therapist and what low self esteem means.
As someone who came from a disordered eating background, I needed this book. I needed to know that I was going to be okay. That I could get past my insecurities and come into my own again. I realized that I needed to learn how to forgive one person: myself. I didn't want to spend the rest of my life in self-doubt, judgement, and shame.
5. The Universe Has Your Back by Gabrielle Bernstein
I literally finished this book a day ago and can't fathom how important this book is. As an avid mediator, this is a book that I highly recommend for those who want to learn about meditation and the power of love. It discusses the power we have when we realize the the universe really does have our back. That we must lean towards love, not hate. Furthermore, that we don't fall into judgement. This book also gives meditations for self-doubt and judgement.
I hope this helps list you all with your spiritual journeys towards and self-love and acceptance. It baffles me how much people don't know about these ideas and concepts. They are life changing and magical on many levels. I hope ya'll have a great day. Love yourself and stay awesome.
6. Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert
I had heard of Elizabeth Gilbert when I was in high school but didn't get into her work until college. And man is she inspiring. In fact, I believe this is a necessary book for life. Elizabeth Gilbert's discussion on creativity blew my mind. As a theatre major and all around creative person, this changed my perspective on creative living.
In the book she talks about the pitfalls and creativity and how everyone is a creative. It doesn't matter if you make a living off it or not. We have a creator inside of us.
In conclusion, these books are highly recommended for those wanting to live in a better mindset. I am not a therapist by any means. I am just a human being wanting to spread the word on these life changing ideas. I hope you all have a wonderful day!
P.S. If you guys have any other book recommendations please list them in the comments below!